praise Archives - Creating Powerful Results

Different Styles Vs. Behaviours

24th May 2010 by Support Leave a Comment

We could spend a number of days and weeks talking about the different ‘people styles’ out there in our lives…but we won’t. Instead we’ll look at different people styles and different behaviours.

What Are ‘People Styles’?

Well, there are various versions on the market that categorise the way we react instinctively in different situations. Some have us as colours and some give us an over-riding word that describes us in those situations. Regardless of how we are categorised, it is our ability to flex that is the key.

All versions of the people styles categorisation that I have come across, have all shown that we can at any time, depending on the situation, move from one style into any of the others. However we usually favour one particular style. When we come across someone else who favours our opposite style, that is where we usually clash.

If we are all able to use all of the styles at different times and in different situations the real key to this is- as I’ve already mentioned – Flexibility. We need to understand and move our style towards the other person’s style to enable better communication to flow so that both parties can be understood better.

Now Behaviour Is A Different Thing Altogether.

We build up our behaviours through positive and negative experiences; therefore we build up good and bad behaviours. We can change our unwanted behaviours by observing/obtaining feedback and recognising and accepting that we have certain behaviours. Once we recognise them, and only when we recognise and accept them, can we then catch ourselves saying or doing the unwanted behaviour and that’s when we can prevent it happening.

When we catch ourselves, we make a mental note and then start to change the behaviour as we are saying or doing it, until we stop saying or doing altogether.

Positive behaviours should always be praised if observed in others, as this is the way to reinforce good behaviours.

So when it comes to styles, we can be flexible if we understand and recognise the other person’s style then move towards that style ourselves. Behaviours, on the other hand, can be changed through recognition. And if you are not prepared to feedback to another constructively, or accept your own difficult to deal with behaviour, then it will never change, so don’t expect it to!

Giving Developmental Feedback

17th May 2010 by Support Leave a Comment

This topic comes up time and time again. I am constantly asked how best to give developmental feedback.

Some people avoid feedback at all costs, some only ever give good feedback (praise – another topic altogether), and others do the opposite, and only give developmental (bad) feedback. Some give the feedback in the wrong manner, while some plan it out and get it just right.

Let’s first look at the issues involved in not feeding back or only giving good feedback. What happens here is that there is no personal growth for the individuals involved. This is just not fair. Everyone deserves to grow on a personal basis. If you only ever get good feedback, then you may actually start to believe you have nothing left to learn. This stifles personal growth too.

There are many ways in which people feedback in the wrong manner

Not planning a proper feedback session
Choosing the wrong time or wrong place
Not investigating all the facts from all sides
Taking too long to get to the point – procrastinating
Not considering the impact of the feedback on the individual
Hitting the person too early and/or too hard with the feedback
Bringing in feelings
Being vague
Not providing help or support for the individual moving forward
Leaving it too long after the event happened
Rushing the feedback to hit deadlines
Lack of respect for the person involved. We don’t need to like who we work with, but we do need to respect their thoughts and opinions.

And countless others.

So How Do You Get It Right Every Time?

There is only one way – by PLANNING.

Plan where, when and how you will deliver the feedback. Have all the facts and specifics from all areas. Make sure you give enough time and respect to the individual concerned.
Timing – Always try to feedback as close to the event as possible. Make sure it is appropriate timing.
Ask the individual for their point of view on the event first, before discussing the facts.
Listen very carefully and take notes if necessary, to help your recall of specifics. Make sure you re-phrase back what you think you’ve heard them say, allowing you to make sure that your understanding is right. Don’t move on until both sides agree on the meaning of what’s been said.
Stick only to specific facts. Avoid hearsay or how you or others may feel about the feedback. This is the biggest mistake people make: using subjectivity. There is no place for subjectivity in developmental feedback; there is only room for fact.
Be clear and direct with the facts. People deserve that.
Together look for ways forward – If it is a skills gap, then set up training. If it is behavioural, then set up a plan of learning between both of you. You both may want to involve another person who can help the individual with the changing behaviour – possibly a mentor?
Review progress by looking for the new behaviour and making sure you encourage the progress. Comment on the positive!
Always remember to give good constructive praise consistently, along with the constructive developmental feedback you give consistently.
Consistency is a big key to all of this – to always – with everyone – be factual, and focus on development, rather than only feeding back when you are fed up with the same problem or issue arising.

Creating a motivational environment is all about people feeling good about growing and developing in a fun environment, and there is no better way to grow than through feedback.

When you use clear, factual feedback consistently – with everyone – and you are open to it yourself, people will thrive on the development.

When Did You Last Praise Your Staff?

14th December 2009 by Support Leave a Comment

It is amazing how we…

Underestimate The Power Of A Simple Thank You!

When we are so busy with work, the simple things can easily be forgotten. When we do have the time to think, like at appraisal time, we are so involved in trying to find things to help develop our staff that, again, we can easily forget the simple and easy ways of creating motivational environments for them.

If We Just Stop And Think About Ourselves For A Moment

When someone appreciates us by saying ‘thank you’ or showing it in some other way, we feel great and are given a real boost. Our performance soars and is easy to replicate as we feel fully appreciated for what we have done.

On the other hand, when our efforts are just taken for granted, or we hear others praised for what they have done while we go unnoticed, we can often feel hurt and unappreciated. Performance may suffer and it may become harder to produce our best work.

So Why Do We Think It Is Any Different For Others?

(This includes our family and friends too!) Who are you taking for granted?

However Be Warned

We need to make the praise, specific, true and timely.

What do I mean by that? Well…if we just go around saying ‘thanks’ or ‘that was good’, all the time and to everyone, it just becomes a nonsense and is unproductive.

There is no need to overdo praise, just mean it! We need to keep looking for the good and productive things that everyone does. That way we can follow the 3 Steps to Great Praise.

3 Steps To Great Praise

1 Look and listen out for specific excellent, quality, productive results from all staff. Everyone does something well every day, so it’s easy to spot if we try.
2 We must really mean it. Our body language needs to be congruent with what we say. If not it will be picked up and it will feel awkward to deliver.
3 Make sure that we praise as soon after the specific event as possible to make the best impact.

If we use the 3 Steps to Great Praise, our staff will definitely feel appreciated and production will be the result of a very simple act from you!

Quick Guide to Dealing with Difficult Situations

24th November 2009 by Support Leave a Comment

Have you ever had someone or something hold you back from a very important task? How do you deal with people who are very nice but seem to be dragging their feet on your important issues?

Do you let it go until the frustration and emotion gets too much and you blow? Or are you reactive, quickly getting angry at the person you are dealing with and even raising your voice?

Below Is A Quick Guide To Dealing With Those Difficult People Or Situations.

The First Thing

We really need to do in these situations is plan our conversations, as this prevents us from being taken away in another direction from our real objective. Work out what we need by the end of the conversation (our agenda and objectives, don’t forget our contingencies too). Write these down and refer to them throughout the conversation.

Next…

…make sure we are dealing with the right person. If the person we are speaking to can not make the necessary decisions for us to achieve our objectives, then we need to go up the chain of command to reach the decision maker, otherwise we will end up completely frustrated and very emotional.

If we can not speak to the right person at that time, make sure we leave the conversation with at least their name and contact details so we can speak directly to them later.

We need to allow the person we are dealing with to have their say completely and without interruption. If something occurs to us, then write it down so we don’t forget, but don’t interrupt! Listen carefully. Check they have completed what they want to say and then rephrase in summary what we believe they are saying. Again, check with them that our summary is right. If they correct our summary, then repeat the rephrase/summary process until we have a full understanding of the situation from the other person’s point of view.

Now We Explain In Detail Our Own Situation:

…both the facts and the impact on our life, practically and emotionally. The key is to ask them to put themselves into our situation and then fire the bullet questions at them: “How would you feel in this situation?” and “What would you expect in this situation?” Let them answer the question – silence is golden at this time. Most people will try to avoid answering these questions by saying something like “I know it can’t be easy” or “I’m sorry, it must be really difficult”. This is not answering the question. So re-state our question until they really put themselves into our shoes and answer the question we’ve asked.

It’s Time To Get What We Came For!

They are now in the position of owing us due to their lack of results – so ask them what they are now willing to do for us. If they don’t suggest what we need, that’s when we suggest what they can now do for us (propose our objectives) after all we have been through.

When we take time to plan out our objectives, we will usually always get a better result than we were expecting.

Remember the times we have planned out a difficult situation in our heads: what someone might say, what we would say in return, how the whole conversation might go?

In this situation, what usually happens is that the conversation doesn’t go according to plan…it goes much better than we would ever have imagined! They don’t say what we were expecting…they say just what we wanted to hear! We feel much better for having the conversation, although we didn’t really want to have it in the first place. And how did we achieve this success? It’s simple – Planning!

Here’s Your Quick Guide Checklist.

Print out, cut around perforations, keep it close, and use it to deal with your difficult situations every day.
Quick Guide Checklist – Difficult situations

Plan your agenda and objectives
Stay positive and calm
Speak to the decision maker
Listen carefully to the other person’s point of view and check for understanding
Explain the situation and ask for what you need
Finish off the conversation with a thank you!

7 Keys to Achieving Motivational Environments

28th October 2009 by Support Leave a Comment

The first thing I’m going to say on this subject will not be news to some of you.

Motivation Comes From Within

No one can ever motivate you: they may be your inspiration, but they can never be your motivation. You motivate you!

Now, if you manage people, or you have a manager that makes you feel motivated, remember it’s a manager’s ability to create a motivational environment for others that allows people to motivate themselves. You may be that type of individual yourself. This is great!

How do you make decisions?

However there are a lot of people out there that feel demotivated at work – so what’s gone wrong?

If You Manage People There Are A Number Of Things That May Need To Be Addressed:

1 What motivates your individual team members and your team as a whole? (Some people say money – this is just not true. Yes, money is important and I have a good system to get to the real motivation of individuals who mention money.)
2 What type of environment are you creating for them – not you?
3 (If you don’t know the true answer to the first question it may be difficult to answer this one.)
4 What real development are you providing so that everyone has the opportunity to learn and grow, not just the people you like?
5 What problems/issues exist in the team at the moment? (If you have none, start to worry!)
6 What are you and/or others, including the team, doing to solve these problems?
7 How much do you know about each person in your team, personally as well as professionally? (This is extremely important, as work affects life and life affects work.)
8 The last, but one of the most important, keys is how much enjoyment do your people receive from their work?

Once you have answered these questions, then you can concentrate on building the environment that the individual and the team with thrive in.

With a team you need to know the answers to the questions above collectively. The two main areas to concentrate your efforts in are the enjoyment of their job, and their learning and development. The only way you can do this is to know the answers to all the questions above.

Don’t Forget To Praise Your Staff Constructively.

Don’t just say “that’s a good job”, follow it up with constructive comments on why it was a good job and it will have a much stronger impact. When was the last time you constructively praised your staff?

If you follow this process you will be guaranteed respect, loyalty, great performance and a fun working environment for everyone.

Too many managers believe this is too much work for them. “Well, keep working extremely hard” is what I say, because “it is harder to constantly work against the people than to put the initial effort in and work with them.”

Flick Your Frustration and Overcome Your Overwhelm!